i started it all over again

and it came across just as usual
-seemingly from nothing, for a good reason for real-
sometimes i wonder if i make these immense efforts to avoid
being let down - as we know perfectly they all are the same (they are all the same!)
with heads up high, keeping themselves much above the surface,
putting themselves first, so at least only in this respect
why should i be different ?
words are golden - trust no one.
so this is for no other being but for the one that makes this happen
(and regarding this, to a certain level you can screw it)

if only

tonight we could sleep - not necessarily
i could turn back time - i don't really think that would help. quite not..
i'd like to be at the end of the road, safe + sound, over.
for the very first time in my life i'm scared to death for my-own-self, yes.
how the fuc.k am i going to sort this one out?
this lot, i mean
suppose i'll have to become my own pshychiatrist again
find the strings, stretch them. thus strenghen them, make them so tight so that they can never
get ripped off. well, not before their time comes..

here it comes again

life got cold
as temperature decreases my mood swings
and there will be blood.
there are at least two persons and a huge generation-gap in-between me.
reading lines from someone before my time claiming someone has to pass away soon
and then going out to the street trying to pretend nothing had happened and you're one of them
feel like them, think like them, exist like them
where do i have to escape to to be able not to run the race with my face and mind all covered up?
the place is in me i guess

its a

bad day
or
b-day morelike

i have

been thinking the same thing for now about a season.
saddening!
but i still have a month to be rather pathetic and then comes lastyear

this weather feels just like winter or autumn
learn to fall
aristocratic tea sessions with wintercoats
just amazing, really

im sooo cancerian

bizony persze

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself."

youre my xy

im amazed
!!

solutions

you ask me how to cure a headache
use a gun
if you think you're doing something special
it's been done

so just think dumb

bloß eingefallen

fashioning your self-escape
traiding on your superwaif

all style before content, using me as bait


swapping you love for

aesthetics over meaning

what's wrong with this picture? what's wrong with this picture?

was passt nicht?
verloren in meiner eigenen welt,
glücklich ab und zu
aber es wird nie richtig
nie ohne sorgen, zweifel und ängste
ich werde immer mit mir sein
zu alleine
versuchen zu vergessen, dass es niemand gibt,
auf dem ich mich verlassen könnte

alles was ich brauche ist ein ruf
danke

it's getting rough again

every day is a drag
getting caught in the rat race
you don't wanna be on the street
and every night when i crash
you can see it in my face
i look like i'm dead on my feet

so i'm folding my cash
gonna live in the country
cause that's what i plan to do
cause the air's never bad
when you live in the country
the sky is always blue